That Was My Mistake

A friend once confessed she had more ups and downs than a merry-go-round. Doesn't that fit the universe itself? It goes in cycles. Birth, life, death. Even stars and galaxies are born, live, and die.

Why should people be any different?

Success also has its ups and downs, but true success isn't determined by "not failing," but by trying again one more time than you fail. Sometimes, that simply takes experience.



Kayelle Allen Backlist



A wise woman once asked, "How do you gain good judgment?" Her mentor replied, "Through experience." The woman considered that a moment and asked, "How do get experience?" The mentor smiled and said, "Poor judgment."

Put that poor judgment to work. Sometimes, experience only helps us recognize the same mistake when we make it again.  How we handle it is up to us. My plan is to live, learn, make mistakes, get back up, dust off my hands, and keep going.

Poor judgment can be a bitter lesson, but it doesn't have to stop us. We can get back up one more time. It's as simple -- and difficult -- as that.

Let me share one of my mistakes in judgment with you, and then you share one of yours. Maybe we’ll learn from each other. Life is too short to make all the mistakes out there; that’s why we have friends and family who advise us how to avoid them. Maybe thinking about this will help when the time for those new year’s resolutions roll around again.

When I was in my twenties, I knew I wanted to write. It was something I’d always dreamed of doing. But I had my first child at twenty-five, and had little free time to spend on myself. Two more children followed within the next few years. I decided I’d start writing when they started school. But that’s when I went back to work, and time was even more precious.

Then this amazing thing happened. I had my fiftieth birthday. I was no closer to being published than I had been at twenty-five. I gave it a lot of thought, and realized that my biggest problem was that I was waiting to find time. I stopped doing that, and started making time. I cut out television except for about three hours a week. I stopped watching movies on the DVD player. I planned meals and shopped more quickly. It was amazing how much time those simple things freed up for me. The thing that made me realize that TV watching had to go was realizing that I was watching other people have a life, but mine was going by the wayside. Ever notice there are rarely scenes of people watching TV on TV?

I wrote daily, at least fifteen minutes a day, no excuses.  I read books on writing. I read the kind of book I wanted to write. I joined a critique group online, and I networked. Within four months, I had a contract for my first book.

So, my poor judgment was waiting for time. I had to learn to make it. So, what’s your "poor judgment" / "big mistake" and how did you overcome it? I'd love to hear.